Maybe Relax A Little Bit And Take A Step Back

Emotionally going through a lot right now.  My aunt is still in a tough spot and I spent half a day with her today.  To be blunt, things are still a bit dicey.  Spending time with her at the hospital brings up too many memories including a recent one, a couple of months ago, when we went on a picnic.

It was her birthday, so my mom invited all of our family and cousins and the plan was to surprise my aunt for her 38th birthday.  It was pretty cool because there were about 22 of us who made it out.  I have an awesome picture of the surprised look on my aunt's face when she realized why mom had "dragged" her to the park. Lol... I need to find it and post it soon.  We had a barbecue with tons of food, great music, floaties for the lake, and of course, these two pretty cool kayaks my uncles own.

Going on a bit of a tangent here but my uncles have inspired me to buy a kayak of my own.  The ones I want are a bit up there in price but I figured I can get something mid-range?  Probably a two person kayak would be the best.  That way, I can take my younger cousins with me or my mom and aunt can borrow mine and go out whenever.

The only real issue is, I'm just not sure how to find super sturdy and quality kayaks under $200!

Back to the memories... I remember eating the best double cheeseburger with Thousand Island and three slices of cheese. I remember this specifically because my aunt and mom teased me about hitting the gym soon afterwards, to which I responded carelessly by laughing into the wind and pointing to my abs... well, my six pack :)

It's really, really tough to see someone who I am this close to laying in the hospital while the rest of us do nothing, helplessly, other than take turns by her side, waiting for good news to come rolling in.  Maybe tomorrow I'll take in her favorite mixed "tape" that I made her forever ago.  Please God, if ever I have asked for anything, it would be this.

This is too much, will continue this blog post later.